Blogs I follow

There is one blog I follow that brings up some interesting questions at the end of each blog about friendship and today's world. I love the blog (www.mwfseekingbff.com), and found it brings some.... interest into my life.

You see, I was raised in a military family. Every three years, we moved someplace NEW. Ohio, Illinois, California, Virginia, Alabama, Germany, Nebraska, back to Alabama.... I went to five different GRADE schools (luckily, jr. high was in one location and high school was in one location).

I wouldn't give up that life for anything - I got to do more and see more of the world by the time I was sixteen than most people do in a life time (I went across the Atlantic 8 times by the time I was 14).

HOWEVER, I think it may have retarded my ability to keep friends. I can make friends easily. Heck, I could talk to a brick wall if need be. I LOVE to talk to people and and enjoy learning about other's lives. The issue is that, growing up, nothing was permanent. People move in and out of our lives. Family remains, but we never really lived close to family to see on a day-to-day basis.

Keeping friends.... well, that's another story. It's so easy, too easy, to drift apart once LIFE happens.

My family moved the summer between my last year of high school and starting college. I chose to move with my family across country and to a university where I knew no one. I joined a sorority. I liked it, but felt like the odd man out. A lot. My sorority sisters were nice, but most of them grew up in the area and knew each other from high school or church. I transferred colleges two years in, and did not stay in touch with any of my "sisters." (side note, thanks to Face Book, I have reconnected with the ones I truly enjoyed being friends with, but they are still in the state I went to college in, no one within 500 miles of me now!)

I always had a core group of 3-4 friends, but that group fluctuated - it's very liquid. And now, married for about a year, I find that even though I have good friends that I can count on for ANYTHING (five, to be exact, and I know I am lucky), our lack of day-to-day or even month-to-month of seeing each other or even talking makes for a feeling of never being able to totally catch up with each other.

I feel ALONE. I know I am not, my husband is wonderful, I have the best family, and good friends. But on that day-to-day need of a female friend, well, there hasn't been one in a while. I can't expect BH to want to discuss "Glee," as he doesn't watch. I can't expect BH to come with me for a mani or pedi, he isn't inclined to get one. We shop together, but usually for things for him, it's more fun to shop for guys or home stuff, anyway. He isn't a female and I can't expect him to fill that need.

But it would be nice to have a friend that I have known for years and can chit-chat with about everything and nothing. From politics to hair color. But I never lived anywhere or stayed in touch with anyone long enough to have that type of friendship.

I think it's part of getting older and having been so mobile. Or maybe I don't need or want that type of friendship as much as I think I do. Or maybe it's that I never had that type of friendship.